Moving On
by brunahilda171
Summary: Lily hates James Potter, but will her feelings for him change during her 7th year? Warning: If suicide, alcohol abuse, drugs, self injury, or any of that kind of thing bother you, you probably shouldn't read it.
1. Chapter 1

**/N: So here's my second fic. Just so you know, it's not named after the song by Good Charlotte... or anything else, for that matter.My friend helped me come up with the title, _then_ I realized that the song really fit the story. So I'm using it. Thanks to Ainsley and Tal for helping me!**

**Lily's POV**

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"Evans, will you go out with me?" James Potter asked, sitting down next to me. It echoed all throughout the Great Hall. I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"Shut up, Potter," I replied disgustedly, scooting as far away from him as possible.

He didn't seem especially perturbed. Well, he shouldn't have, considering he did it every day. And every day the answer was the same. Why did he always mess around like this? He obviously didn't mean it. Right?

"Am I really that bad Evans?" He wanted to know, messing up his jet-black hair with one hand and grinning expectantly at me.

"Yes, Potter," I answered coldly. "Now leave me alone!" My best friends Cassara Anderson, Eve Wallace, Robyn Tanner, and Scarlett Field were all staring at me like I was nuts. Even though my friends and I had mostly the same interests, there was one thing we disagreed on—our views on James Potter. They thought he was "gorgeous" (in the words of Robyn) and wished he would do it to them.

I finished my food hurriedly and fled up to the dormitory I shared with Cassara, Eve, Robyn, and Scarlett. Scarlett, Robyn, and Cassara came into the dormitory soon after.

"I still don't know what's so bad about him, Lil," Cassara said. "He's cute. And he's nice, once you get to know him."

"He's nice to the two of us in Quidditch," Robyn added. "Plus, he totally loves you."

"You haven't had him asking you out every day for the past four years," I reminded her, starting to pack my trunk. "And I can't believe you guys can't tell he's just joking. He only does it because he knows it annoys me."

Scarlett turned to Cassara and Robyn and said, "I wonder how long it'll take before Lily finally realizes that James actually _does_ like her."

"I can hear you, you know," I told them. They shrugged and started packing their trunks in silence.

"Next year is our last year here," Cassara said, breaking the silence.

"Thanks for reminding us, Cassie," Robyn retorted. "That's the last thing I wanted to hear right now. I mean, later today I'm going to be back home, stuck with my magic-hating mum. I mean, really. It's not _my_ fault Dad ran off. Or my fault she's a squib. She's just jealous that I get to be a part of the wizarding community and she doesn't."

"And it's not your fault you're a witch, either," Scarlett pointed out. "And I'm sure you can all come over to my house this summer."

"That would be nice," I said, sighing.

"It must be awful for you, with your sister and all," Cassara said.

I nodded. "She was really nice to me until the day I got my letter. Then I was no longer 'normal,' and she wouldn't speak to me." I stopped there, aware that the three of them knew the story almost as well as I did. That's when it hit me—there were only three of them.

"Where's Eve?" I asked.

"I dunno," Robyn replied. "Last I saw, she was talking to James, but it's been a while…"

As if on cue, Eve walked into the room, smiling broadly and blushing. "James actually talked to me today!" she exclaimed. "He asked me how my summer was! Isn't that great?"

Everyone except me congratulated Eve on her accomplishment (it didn't seem like much to me; he had been talking to her for the past six years, and all I ever wanted was for him to _stop_ talking to me). I stayed silent and thought, _She's way too good for James! _

We all knew that Eve had liked James since third year, and for her this was a big thing. It was a good thing that she was understanding about how James treated me, or else we probably would've wound up hating each other. But she knew I didn't want him to ask me out.

"Evans, will you go out with me?" James Potter asked, sitting down next to me. It echoed all throughout the Great Hall. I sighed and rolled my eyes."Shut up, Potter," I replied disgustedly, scooting as far away from him as possible.He didn't seem especially perturbed. Well, he shouldn't have, considering he did it every day. And every day the answer was the same. Why did he always mess around like this? He obviously didn't mean it. Right?"Am I really that bad Evans?" He wanted to know, messing up his jet-black hair with one hand and grinning expectantly at me."Yes, Potter," I answered coldly. "Now leave me alone!" My best friends Cassara Anderson, Eve Wallace, Robyn Tanner, and Scarlett Field were all staring at me like I was nuts. Even though my friends and I had mostly the same interests, there was one thing we disagreed on—our views on James Potter. They thought he was "gorgeous" (in the words of Robyn) and wished he would do it to them.I finished my food hurriedly and fled up to the dormitory I shared with Cassara, Eve, Robyn, and Scarlett. Scarlett, Robyn, and Cassara came into the dormitory soon after."I still don't know what's so bad about him, Lil," Cassara said. "He's cute. And he's nice, once you get to know him.""He's nice to the two of us in Quidditch," Robyn added. "Plus, he totally loves you.""You haven't had him asking you out every day for the past four years," I reminded her, starting to pack my trunk. "And I can't believe you guys can't tell he's just joking. He only does it because he knows it annoys me."Scarlett turned to Cassara and Robyn and said, "I wonder how long it'll take before Lily finally realizes that James actually like her.""I can hear you, you know," I told them. They shrugged and started packing their trunks in silence."Next year is our last year here," Cassara said, breaking the silence."Thanks for reminding us, Cassie," Robyn retorted. "That's the last thing I wanted to hear right now. I mean, later today I'm going to be back home, stuck with my magic-hating mum. I mean, really. It's not fault Dad ran off. Or my fault she's a squib. She's just jealous that I get to be a part of the wizarding community and she doesn't." "And it's not your fault you're a witch, either," Scarlett pointed out. "And I'm sure you can all come over to my house this summer.""That would be nice," I said, sighing."It must be awful for you, with your sister and all," Cassara said.I nodded. "She was really nice to me until the day I got my letter. Then I was no longer 'normal,' and she wouldn't speak to me." I stopped there, aware that the three of them knew the story almost as well as I did. That's when it hit me—there were only three of them."Where's Eve?" I asked."I dunno," Robyn replied. "Last I saw, she was talking to James, but it's been a while…"As if on cue, Eve walked into the room, smiling broadly and blushing. "James actually talked to me today!" she exclaimed. "He asked me how my summer was! Isn't that great?"Everyone except me congratulated Eve on her accomplishment (it didn't seem like much to me; he had been talking to her for the past six years, and all I ever wanted was for him to talking to me). I stayed silent and thought, We all knew that Eve had liked James since third year, and for her this was a big thing. It was a good thing that she was understanding about how James treated me, or else we probably would've wound up hating each other. But she knew I didn't want him to ask me out.

* * *

When we finished packing I went down to the Common Room to talk to my friends in other years. I didn't get past the first few steps before someone flung herself at me. "Lily! I'll miss you so much!" Marlene McKinnon exclaimed, running up and hugging me. "I can't believe I'm not coming back here next year!" 

"I know. It won't be the same without you guys," I said, addressing her and her best friend, Dorcas Meadowes. They went to talk to Eve, Robyn, and Scarlett up in our dorm.

"Hey, Lil," Juliette Wallace said. She was Eve's younger sister and was heading into her sixth year after the summer. She looked almost exactly the same as Eve, with light brown hair, olive skin, and big hazel eyes, although she was slightly chubbier (but not fat, by any means) and shorter. "I just got—" she broke off when Eve came up behind me. "Eve, I just got a letter from Mum. It's addressed to both of us."

"Well, open it!" Eve ordered.

"Well, I'm sorry! I didn't want to open it until I knew where you were!" She replied defensively.

"I wonder what she'd be _sending_ you so late in the year?" Robyn pondered aloud. Eve shrugged.

"Just open it, Juli!" she exclaimed impatiently. "It must be important."

"Okay, okay!" Juli said, ripping the seal open and unfolding the letter. Her jaw dropped as she read over the letter, and her eyes welled up with tears.

Eve was acting much more impatient and childish than usual; I could tell she was afraid something terrible had happened. She had a reason to be though—Voldemort had been running throughout England trying to kill all the witches and wizards who weren't purebloods. Why else would her mum send her something so late in the year?

She snatched the letter from her pale sister who was now crying silently. She read it and started to cry as well. "Voldemort's killed Eddie and Dad!" she sobbed. Eddie was their brother who was two years older than Eve and had been training to be an Auror, and their dad had been an Auror as well.

"Wow," Robyn said. We were all dumbstruck and incredibly horrified. "That's terrible! Let's go tell Dumbledore. I'm sure he can make a Portkey or something to get you home as fast as possible…"

She led them off down the stairs and out of the portrait hole.

"Oh my god," Scarlett said, looking as if she was close to tears herself. "That's so horrible."

I nodded, and we headed down the steps and sat on one of the big scarlet couches. We sat in silence until Alice Nelson came up holding her boyfriend Frank Longbottom's hand. Alice was going into sixth year next year. Alice was barely five feet tall and slightly chubby, with dark brown hair and blue eyes. She was always happy and smiling. Today was no different.

When she saw us, her smile immediately dropped. "What's wrong? Where are Eve and Robyn?"

"Eve went home," I said. I wasn't really in the mood to explain anything. "Her brother and dad were killed. And Robyn's taking her and Juliette to see Dumbledore right now."

"Goodness! That's horrible!" Alice gasped. The three of us nodded unenthusiastically. "I can't believe—"

She was cut off by Professor McGonagall. "It's time to board the train, students. Prefects, please come here and help keep everyone in order."

That was my cue to go up and help, as well as Remus Lupin (one of James's good friends and fellow "Marauders." Marauders was the name Potter gave himself and his posse, which consisted of him, Remus, Peter Pettigrew, and Sirius Black, two of the other Gryffindor boys. The only one it didn't include was Gregg Anderson, Cassara's twin brother), Alice, and Sam Finney (the 5th year male prefect). We spent a half-hour directing people down the corridors and making sure no one got hurt. It was boring and completely uneventful; no one at this school was stupid enough to get into a rush

We were the last to board the train, but luckily we had been saved a compartment. Scarlett came out of the train to show us where we were. It was relatively full, with Frank, Scarlett, Robyn, Cassara, Marlene, Dorcas, Hazel Banagher, and Will Roland (dating fifth years that were friends with Juliette). Hazel and Will moved to the floor to fit Alice and me. It was incredibly crowded, but we knew it was probably better than some of the other compartments.

They greeted us, and we smiled and returned their greetings.

"Would you be surprised if I told you that was completely uneventful and unnecessary?" Alice asked dryly, sitting down in between Frank and me. "Honestly! No one wants to get out of this school badly enough to get into a stampede!"

The train started to move, and Hazel asked, "Where are Eve and Juli?" There was a note of panic in her voice. "They'll miss the train!"

Scarlett sighed and said wearily, "She's not coming on the train."

Marlene's brow furrowed and she questioned, "Why not, is she just going to stay at Hogwarts for the whole summer?"

"She went home earlier because her brother and dad were killed," Robyn replied.

Marlene, Dorcas, and Hazel gasped; Will looked stunned. "By who?" Dorcas inquired, leaning across the car because the three of us had become very quiet. Her blue eyes narrowed suspiciously; she could tell what was coming. A strand of her ear-length hair fell into her face, but she completely ignored it. Her stare kind of scared me.

"Voldemort," Robyn, Scarlett, and I chorused grimly. Everyone's eyes widened.

Hazel shuddered. "It's terrible, how Voldemort's murdering half-bloods and muggle-borns. We're basically all targets!" She thought of what she'd just said, then corrected, "Well, maybe not Scarlett. Or Frank. Or Alice. But the rest of us could be his next targets!

"Why did you even have to bring that up?" Hazel asked, shivering. "Let's talk about something else."

We all obliged, talking about other things throughout he rest of the ride. But no matter how much we laughed or talked, there was always an ominous feeling in the background, and it terrified me. I didn't want to die.

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**A/N: I hoped you liked it! Don't forget to drop in a review!  
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	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: ****The story's a bit slow to start, I know. But bear with me. Soon it will get _much _more interesting... Plus, my friend who used to do the really thorough editing kind of stopped for some reason, so I'm having a hard time (Not that you're not a great help, Ainsley--believe me, you are). I think I'll have to get a beta... anyway, please read and review!**

I sighed and sat down on my bed at home. Sirius sat down next to me. "Pretty strange day, huh?" I asked.

Sirius nodded. "What happened with Eve exactly?"

I didn't really wanting to think any more today, but explained it to him anyway.

_Flashback_

After our "morning ritual," Lily fled and, like always, Robyn and Scarlett followed her without finishing their breakfast. To my surprise, Eve stayed there, finishing her food and smiling shyly at me while I dished up some waffles for myself. I knew she had liked me for a long time, and I tried to avoid leading her on. Lily was the girl for me; I just knew it, even if she didn't.

"Why don't you just give up on her?" she asked hesitantly, refusing to look me in the eyes. I could tell that it wasn't because she was acting jealous; she was genuinely curious.

"Because I love her," I replied simply, not in the least bit embarrassed. It was not a big deal to me anymore; everyone knew. And I felt that being honest with her was the best way to go.

"She thinks it's all a joke!" Eve informed me. "She thinks you just do it because it bugs her." Eve looked me straight in the eyes. She was very pretty. Her huge hazel eyes were fixed on me, and her skin was flawless.

"I'm not!" I exclaimed. Her eyes dropped when I said this.

"What are you doing this summer?" she asked after a bit of an awkward silence, trying to keep the conversation going.

I was slightly annoyed that she was pushing it so hard, but I decided to be as polite as possible. No matter how pretty she was, if she was going to try so hard I couldn't possibly imagine even being friends with her. "I'm just… well, I'm not doing anything. I'm staying at my house with Sirius."

"I'm going to hang out at home. With my brother and sister," she said, looking up again. With a note of pride in her voice, she said, "Eddie's training to be an Auror. How about you?" She flipped her brown hair behind her ear and smiled seductively at me. I sighed inwardly and wished I could leave.

We continued to talk for about ten more minutes (well, she did most of the talking. I had no idea what was she said because my mind was elsewhere) before I finally looked down at my plate and realized that it was empty; I was glad to have an excuse to go. Eve had been blabbering on for practically the whole time.

"Well, I'd better go. I have a lot of packing to do."

"Oh, yeah, same," she said. She talked a little more while walking up to the Common Room.

"Bye," Eve said, heading into her dormitory.

"See you later," I replied. I went up the stairs to my dorm.

End of Flashback

I explained this to Sirius, and he looked at me suspiciously. "Are you falling for Eve?"

I shook my head. "No! She's talks too much. And she tries way too hard."

"Eve is Lily's best friend," Sirius said.

"I know," I said irritably.

He sighed and shook his head. "Don't you get it? You could use her as a way to get to Lily."

"Sirius! That's horrible," I chided.

"Oh, come on, you've done it before! Admit it," he said.

"I feel so sorry for Eve, though. She just lost her dad and brother," I said, changing the subject with the first thing that came to mind. I had never done anything like that; he had, but I would never do something like that.

"But that's not why you like her, is it?"

"I do _not_ like her!" I replied crossly.

_Flashback_

We went back to the dorm to get our trunks, levitating them down the stairs and through the Great Hall. We got on the train very early; we were practically the first people there. We made the best of it, playing on Sirius's chess board. Sirius and I were evenly matched, but Peter was almost laughably bad. He had no sense of strategy; that was probably part of the reason he didn't play Quidditch like the rest of the Marauders.

Remus entered the compartment just as the train started to move. He sat down across from me. I was playing Sirius and my queen was beating up his knight, so I stared intently down at the chessboard, only breaking my concentration by saying, "Hey, Moony."

"Hey." He was much quieter than usual. Not that he was normally loud.

Sirius and I looked at each other, then at Remus. He looked back at us. "What's wrong?" Sirius asked. "You're too quiet."

He shrugged. "Nothing, really. I've just been thinking."

"About what?" I persisted.

"Well, Lily told me Eve's dad and brother were killed by Voldemort," he said. "I mean, it could happen to anyone, really. Especially me. I mean, I am a half-blood. In more ways than one." He smiled grimly.

I sat there, stunned. What Voldemort was doing was completely disgusting; I could barely stand it. There was absolutely nothing wrong with people who weren't purebloods!

"I'm scared," Remus admitted. "I mean, from the sound of it, he just shows up on people's doorsteps and then kills them all. Or he sends his Death Eaters to do it for him."

Sirius grimaced. "How much do you wanna bet Bellatrix is a Death Eater?" he asked. No one answered, and we didn't talk for a long time. We stayed silent, playing chess and just thinking.

My mind was full; I thought about how Eve's summer had been ruined by Voldemort. I thought about all of the things I had done with the Marauders and what might happen when we graduated next year. And, as usual, I thought of Lily.

It was right about then that I started losing to Peter.

End of Flashback

"It is too bad," Sirius said sympathetically after we had pondered it for a little while. I guess he decided to just go along with my rapid change of subject. "And also kind of scary. I mean, think about it—Voldemort is out to get muggleborns and half-bloods. And people like your parents, who don't support his movement to get the people who aren't purebloods out."

"Yeah," I said. I really wanted to stop talking about it. "I'm starving. Want to go get some food?"

Sirius nodded, and we headed downstairs to eat.

* * *

A few weeks later, Remus came to join us. He waited until about a week after the full moon to come, but he still looked horrible. It was obvious that it had been a hard transformation for him.

Remus was a werewolf, but almost no one knew. No one, that is, besides the two of us, Peter Pettigrew, our other friend, the teachers, and someone else—Severus Snape.

_Flashback_

"So now that I know your dear friend's secret, what will you do for me?" Snape asked, smiling maliciously.

"You bastard," Sirius almost yelled. "Why should we do anything for you? We can just kill you when you mention it."

"Is that supposed to scare me?" Snape inquired haughtily, eyebrows raised. Poor Remus. He was covered in cuts and scratches and looked like he was about to cry. He had just undergone an especially difficult transformation and, to make matters worse, Sirius had played a trick on Snape, almost making him run straight into werewolf-Remus. Remus was done yelling at Sirius, but I could tell he was still pissed. But who wouldn't be?

"I'll pay you fifty Galleons if you shut up, Snivellus," I offered.

"One hundred," he said.

"Sixty."

"Ninety."

"Sixty-Five."

"Eighty-Five."

"Final offer, Snivellus. Seventy Galleons. Take it or leave it," I hissed to him. Even though we were in an empty classroom, someone could walk in at any moment and hear us. Then I would have to pay even more. Not that it was actually a big deal; my family's quite rich, but I still didn't like to part with my money…

"Fine," he agreed disdainfully. "I expect it by tomorrow." He stood and walked briskly out of the room.

Remus gazed at me wearily. "How am I going to pay?" he asked.

"You're not. I am," I said.

He stared at me in disbelief "I can't let you do that! It's not your fault." He glanced at Sirius in a slightly angry manner. "You're the one who kept him from actually coming into the Shack!"

"I'm your friend Remus. Friends help each other, and you obviously need help," I told him.

"I promise to pay you back someday," he said.

I shook my head exasperatedly. "You don't have to pay me back! I'm doing this as a favor to you because you need it!"

"I just hope he actually stays quiet," Remus whispered.

End of Flashback

That had been a year ago, but the fear was still present. Remus thought about it every day—it was obvious to anyone who was around him a lot. He would occasionally go into periods where he would kind of space out and look worried. I hoped that if Snivellus hadn't told yet, he probably wouldn't ever. But I still wasn't so sure.

"Are you okay, Remus?" I asked.

"Sorry we couldn't be there, mate," Sirius apologized.

He shrugged with his good shoulder and said, "I'm fine. I've had worse."

We continued to talk, and he asked about Eve. So I had to explain it all over again.

Once I finished explaining, Remus asked, "Do you like her?"

I sighed angrily. "No! And please don't start that, too. Sirius has been doing it all summer so far and I'm already going crazy. Eve is annoying and too talkative. And she tries too hard."

"Just give up on Lily. I hate to tell you mate, but you'll probably never get her if you haven't already. And really—there are tons of girls who would kill to go out with you. And Eve is one of them," Sirius said.

"I don't like Eve!" I told them heatedly. "This is the year Lily will finally realize that I'm not a terrible person. I can feel it."

"Maybe, but I still think that you should try going out with Eve," said Sirius.

Remus sighed. "Do whatever you want, James. We're—well, I'm not going to stop you."

"I don't like Eve!" I repeated.

"Just think about it, mate," Sirius suggested. "You have all summer."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I'm having a hard time keeping this interesting. I promise it'll get a lot better later… I have some slightly gruesome things planned. So if you don't like that, I suggest you stop reading now. I'll try to get the next chapter up ASAP!**

**Lily's POV**

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**"Bye, see you later!" Scarlett called. Her long, pale blonde hair whipped as she turned around. 

"Bye," we all yelled after her.

"Robyn, I really like your hair cut that way. Hazel did a really good job," Cassara said.

"Thanks, I do too," Robyn replied. About ten minutes before we got off the bus Robyn declared that she was bored with her look and wanted Hazel to cut her hair shorter. "Cut it as short as you can get it so I can still get it in a ponytail," Robyn had said. Hazel had obliged. I had to admit, she did look really good with it, even though it probably did mean she'd be grounded for the rest of her life by her domineering mother.

"I can't wait until next year!" Cassara squealed, her dark brown eyes sparkling. As usual, she was so full of energy she couldn't focus on one topic for more than a minute or two. "It'll be so much fun!"

"We have NEWTs," I reminded her.

Robyn raised her eyebrow. "Are you really that nervous, Lil? You did so well on the OWLs. And you're the top of our class."

"Of course I'm nervous!" I exclaimed. "Aren't you guys?"

"No," Cassara said.

"We'll do fine," Robyn said. "All of us will do perfectly fine." I could tell she was nervous though, because she was fingering her nose. When she was a third year, she had gotten hit in the face with a Bludger as the Keeper. It had broken her nose, and ever since then she had had slight a bump on the bridge of her nose. Whenever she was nervous or self-conscious, she would rub the bump.

"You're lying, Robyn," I said. "You're nervous. You're doing that thing with your nose again."

She immediately dropped her hand. "Well, maybe I'm a little nervous."

"You're lying!" Cassara exclaimed. Her pale face lit up with a grin. "You're really nervous. And you know it!"

All of a sudden I heard footsteps coming toward us. We turned around to see who it was, and saw that it was Gregg.

"Hey Gregg," I greeted him.

"Hi," said Gregg. "Cassara, we have to go this way." He pointed toward the right  
Cassara gave me a big hug. "See you later, Lils." She hugged Robyn, too, then walked away after Gregg.

Looking over at Robyn's short black ponytail, I asked, "What do you think your mum will think of your new haircut?"

"She'll hate it," she replied with a touch of defiance and certainty in her voice.

"Oh." There was nothing I could say to that, was there? I was sure I would never be brave enough to do that. If I knew my parents wouldn't like something, I couldn't do it. I couldn't face them when they got angry at me.

"I'm a coward, Robyn," I said sadly.

"What are you talking about?" asked Robyn. She rubbed at her arm where she had gotten the latest cut, a scar from tripping over the pile of clothes on her side of the room and scraping her arm against her bed. She had a little bit of a reputation of being a klutz off the field, but she dominated in any sport she tried. She was the Seeker on the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

"I always do exactly as everyone tells me without even thinking about it. I can't make decisions for myself," I replied.

"That's not true, Lily, and you know it," Robyn told me firmly. "You can make plenty of decisions for yourself. You just don't like angering people. Normally the only person I'm angering is my mother, and it's not like I'll ever make _he_r happy."

"I'm sure she doesn't hate you," I said to her. She just shrugged and said nothing. I spotted my mum talking to her mum a little ways ahead of us and said, "Well, there are our parents."

"Bye, Lily," said Robyn. "I hope I'll see you later this summer."

"I hope so too," I said. "I don't want to spend any more time with my sister than I have to."

We approached our parents, and they said goodbye to each other. I could tell from Mum's clipped tone that she didn't like Robyn's mum very much. To be honest, I don't think anyone did. She terrified me and all of my friends, even Robyn.

As soon as we got there, her mum turned to her. "Come, Robyn," she ordered.

Robyn waved and walked off, sighing.

"We need to hurry. We have to make sure your bridesmaid dress fits you so we can get a new one if it doesn't fit," Mum said, kissing me quickly on the cheek.

I gaped at her. _"Bridesmaid?"_

"Of course. Petunia's getting married. Didn't I tell you?" Mum asked.

"No."

"Oh, I'm sorry. Well, you're one of her bridesmaids."

"Did she agree to this?" I asked skeptically. Mum couldn't accept that we didn't like each other, so she tried everything to force us to be together. This included setting us up on things like this.

"It doesn't matter what Petunia thinks. You're her sister; you have to be in her wedding."

It was hard to believe that Petunia and I were related. We didn't look at all alike—she had stick-straight bleached-blond hair (which would've been dark brown if she didn't waste all her money bleaching it) and was quite tall (but her long neck probably made up half that height). I was short, just reaching five feet four inches, and I had wavy red hair that I normally kept back in a ponytail. It was just lower-maintenance that way. She had huge, bug-like blue eyes whereas I had green eyes. Petunia was very skinny, not that I wasn't, but she looked unhealthy. One time she ate only carrot sticks for lunch for a whole year. I had a huge sweet tooth. Petunia wouldn't eat chocolate if you gave her money.

I think that part of the reason she hated me so much was because I had stolen my parents' attention when the letter to Hogwarts came. She had always been the favorite— after all, she was the oldest. And she always had friends surrounding her. They used to be nice to me, but I think that was only because Petunia made them. That was back when we were still friends. Now one of their favorite pastimes was Lily-bashing, which consisted of going up to me and flinging as many insults at me as they possibly could. After a particularly long and annoying session I couldn't take it anymore I punched Yvonne, her best friend, and almost broke her nose. I got grounded for a month and had all my books taken away from me. This resulted in me not getting any of my homework done until the night before classes started. It all would've been fine, if it had actually _stopped_ the insults. On the contrary, it made Petunia and her friends _more_ inclined to tease me. It was kind of surprising that my parents never realized anything—they still thought Petunia was a good daughter.

But as flawless as she seemed to my parents, she loved to insult people who weren't normal. But what was "normal" anyway? She certainly wasn't it—regular people ate food. And normal people weren't nosy. And in a witch or wizard's mind, muggles weren't normal. So normal didn't exist. I would never tell Petunia that, though. She would probably rip my eyes out.

"I don't want to be Petunia's bridesmaid," I told Mum blatantly. "She doesn't like me."

Mum gave me an exasperated look. "What makes you think that? You two are best friends."

"She hates me Mum, can't you see?" I yelled. I looked around; there were people staring at us. But who wouldn't stare? A teenage girl was arguing with her mother in the middle of King's Cross Station. And the girl was dragging a trunk and carrying an owl in a cage. "We should get out of here," I said. We made the way to the car in silence.

Once in the car I continued, "Mum, Petunia hates me. She thinks I'm a freak."

"Nonsense. She's just not used to having you around," argued Mum. "It's going to take a while for her to get used to her sister being a witch."

"It's been six years, Mum. If she was going to get used to it she already would have!" I replied. "How can you not see that?" A tear trickled down my face; I hated Petunia. Well, I don't think it was necessarily that; I hated what she had done to me, how she had treated me after she found out I was a witch. As much as it hurt, I knew she wasn't going to change anytime soon.

"Lily, if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all," ordered Mum. "I'm sick of hearing all of these lies."

"Fine," I replied dully.

The car ride home was silent from then on. Although it was slightly awkward, it was better than arguing about how my sister and I got along.

As soon as the car stopped at my house I jumped out and shut the door. "Your dress in on the bed. I'd like you to try it on to make sure it fits," Mum told me.

I simply sighed and nodded dully. Mum narrowed her green eyes at me and flipped her hair over her shoulder.

I had inherited many of my physical characteristics from my mother—my green eyes, red hair, basically my overall appearance was exactly like hers. I wasn't sure how much our personalities were alike, though; we often argued, although mostly about pointless things, but soon forgot about what we were arguing about and made up.

I stared down at my feet, surveying the peeling red paint on the stairs. Our big, shingled house used to bring me comfort as a child; when people would tease me I would run home crying and, strange as it sounds, I would instantly feel better. But I didn't get any comfort now; it felt like I was walking into a torture chamber.

Mum got to the door before me and rammed her key into the lock much more aggressively than normal and glared at me, obviously still annoyed. She swung it open and I heard Dad greet her. Then she muttered, "Lily's being impossible."

"How so?" Dad said, his voice fading away as they moved away from the door.  
I sighed as I made my way through the door and thought, _How am I going to survive like this until after the wedding?_

I was making my way up to my room when I ran into something. Something very bony. "Watch where you're going, freak," Petunia said disgustedly. I said nothing and just stood still for a moment, watching Petunia and waiting for her to continue on. She gave me a funny look, then sauntered past scowling. Once she made her way by, I trudged up the steps to my room.

"Lily, try on your dress," prompted Mum, shouting from the kitchen.

"I'm going," I yelled back irritably. My room was just at the top of the stairs, so once I was at the top I crossed the hallway and opened the door hesitantly. Every time I left for school, I always expected to come back and find it completely different. That never happened, though; my parents went into my room to clean it (they were huge neat-freaks and couldn't handle dust anywhere in their house, even in a room they seldom entered), but they left it alone otherwise. The walls were the same light lavender and dark purple sheets still covered my huge canopy bed. The bedside table with my phone on it was still next to it, and it even had the scrap of paper with Robyn's phone number on it. She had given it to me before last summer and told me to call if I ever had a problem. We did spend a good deal of time on the phone that summer even though there wasn't a problem, though, which, of course, infuriated Petunia. But whenever she went on one of her rants my parents and I tuned her out, so nothing ever came of it and she eventually stopped.

I looked at my bed and, sure enough, laying on it was the ugliest dress I had ever seen. It was bright pink and covered in lace and ruffles. I snorted in disgust, but shut my door and pulled off my clothes. I was not looking forward to wearing it. _Maybe if it doesn't fit I'll be able to get out of the wedding,_ I thought as I pulled it over my head. As soon as it was on, I turned to the mirror on the back of my door and surveyed myself. Huh, just my luck. Perfect fit.  
I could tell this was going to be a long summer.

* * *

**A/N: Well, there it is… I hope you like it! Please review! **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Well, I haven't done this yet, so I will now: As much as I wish I owned Harry Potter and had been brilliant enough to come up with the idea myself... I didn't. So I don't own anything you recognize.**

**James's POV**

**

* * *

**"What's wrong, Prongs? You've barely talked at all this summer," Sirius said, flopping down on the couch next to me. I had been sitting in peace, thinking quietly to myself about Eve and the conversation we'd had. Well, actually I was thinking about how weird it was that I was still thinking about it after over a month, but that was basically the same thing. At least I thought so. 

"Nothing," I replied.

"You're thinking about Eve, Aren't you?" Sirius asked.

Sometimes Sirius could read people's minds, I swear. "Of course not!" I answered irritably. Then I turned away from him and continued thinking.

_Well, she is quite pretty,_ I thought to myself. _But she won't stop bugging me._

"I think the only reason you're denying that there might even be a possibility you would like her is because you think she's an easy catch," Sirius told me.

"I never said there was no possibility I would go out with her!" I exclaimed, becoming slightly exasperated.

"You like her then?" Sirius inquired.

"I never said that!" I responded indignantly. "Stop twisting my words!"

"It seems like it to me." Remus said, startling me. I jumped and turned to see Remus sitting down next to Sirius.

"It's not going to happen," I replied firmly.

"I think it is," Sirius whispered loudly to Remus behind his hand. I turned around again and glared at him.

He grinned at me and shrugged. I rolled my eyes, deciding that saying anything else would just make it worse.

* * *

A few days later we received the lists of supplies we would need for our next year at Hogwarts and the day after we went to Diagon Alley to get what we needed. I found out that I was the Quidditch team captain this year, which I was excited about. Last year's captain had been a total idiot. 

And I was Head Boy, something that my parents were definitely proud of. I, however, was shocked. Everyone thought Remus would get it, and he seemed slightly disappointed. But, as usual, he got over it fast, stating "I never would've been able to do it, since I'm a werewolf and all."

Mum, who was a bit of a worrywart, was nervous about the three of us going by ourselves.

"We're seventeen, Mum," I told her. "We can take care of ourselves."

"Yes, but with Voldemort running around with al of his allies, who knows what you'll find?" she argued worriedly, her eyebrows furrowed.

"I doubt he'd try anything. There are too many people at Diagon Alley," I reasoned.

The discussion continued. Sirius and I argued that we could take care of ourselves, since my mum was more like his mum than she would ever be, but that didn't work. Even Dad's persuasion didn't sway her very much. I was amazed that she had actually let us go to Diagon Alley by ourselves, but I guess she just thought that since it was so busy Voldemort wouldn't attempt anything.

"We will," I shouted as we walked out the front door, swinging it shut after us. Then we concentrated on Diagon Alley and Apparated there. I almost enjoyed it; after all, it meant we could actually get out of the house.

Gringotts was our first stop. Once we were out, I turned to Remus and Sirius and asked, "Where should we go first?"

"I think we should go to Flourish and Botts," Remus answered quietly. Sirius just shrugged, so we set off.

I was expecting a lot of people to be there, but all of the stores were literally _packed._ We had to stand in line for half an hour or more at some stores and it was almost impossible to move around a lot of places. We went as fast as we could, but it was well past noon by the time we finished. As we walked out of the last store, our arms weighed down with bags, Sirius said, "I'm hungry. Let's get ice cream."

We headed off to Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlor and ordered sundaes. Remus and I were done long before Sirius on account of the fact that he ordered three. He kept staring at the gap between Remus and I, and the two of us were trying hard to figure out what it was.

"What do you think it is?" Remus said under his breath.

I shrugged and whispered, "It's probably a girl."

"Should we turn around and look?" he asked.

"No," I muttered, "if it's girl, we'll know soon enough."

Just as I'd suspected, a girl appeared between me and Sirius a couple minutes later. She had pretty blond hair, big blue eyes, and a big chest, but she wasn't really my type. She was definitely Sirius's, though. I recognized her from school; I think she was the year behind us.

"Hey, Sirius," she said flirtatiously, grinning at him.

"Hi," he said, stalling. I could tell he was trying to remember her name.

"Sirius," Remus leaned over and whispered just loud enough for me to hear it, "You won't ever remember your name if you don't look at her face." I snorted.

He glared at Remus and asked, "How are you, Alma?" He stood up and put an arm around her waist.

"It's Allison," she giggled as he led her across the street to a park bench. It took them less than a minute to start making out.

Remus shook his head. "How the hell does he do that?" I could hear a bit of jealousy in his voice. But he did it to himself, at least to a certain extent. It was his theory that he had to distance himself from girls because he thought they would dump him when they found out the truth about his mysterious disappearances.

"You could do it, too," I told him while trying my best to sound encouraging. I had never had to tell anyone that before. "It's your own decision not to have a girlfriend."

'But how would I tell them without them breaking up with me?" he inquired exasperatedly. He was practically yelling by now. "They would probably break up with me on the spot and tell everyone they knew. That's how girls are!"

"Well, we didn't leave you," I reasoned.

"You're not my girlfriends," he said. I was practically falling out of my chair laughing, and once he realized how stupid it was, he was laughing, too.

"Remus, that's not the point. The point is that if she really loves you she won't leave," I explained. "So just make sure that you go out with the right girl. Or girls."

"How will I know?" he asked.

"You just will," I replied. "It's something that hits you as soon as you see them."

"Really?" he said skeptically.

"Well, it's not always the first time you see them," I admitted. "Maybe the first time you go out with them. Or the first couple times."

"Do you really think I could get a girl to go out with me?" he asked sincerely.

"Yes, Remus, you could. I think you should ask Scarlett out."

He just stared doubtfully at me.

"Come on," I tried to persuade him. "She likes you, you like her… and she's a great girl. She would never tell anyone, even if you did break up."

"You think so?" It sounded like it was starting to work.

"Yeah, I do." In my mind, I thought that Scarlett was the girl for him, kind of like Lily was the girl for me. The two of them just seemed so… perfect for each other.

"Well, if you say so…" he started.

It couldn't have been stranger timing; at that exact moment, I spotted Lily walking down the street with Scarlett. My stomach dropped slightly as I noticed once again how pretty she was. . But it almost wasn't the same; it was probably the millionth time I'd noticed that, and it wasn't as profound as it had been the first few times. But she always looked the best with her friends. She was always so casual and unguarded around them. That was the girl I had fallen in love with—the Lily that laughed and told jokes with her friends. I hadn't fallen in love with her telling me to go away.

Then Cassara and Robyn walked out of a nearby store and joined the group. I saw Lily look over and see us, a look of disgust passing over her face. She covered her hand and whispered to Scarlett, who smiled at Remus and stood, wading through the crowd in our direction.

"What do I do?." Remus demanded in a strangled whisper, his face turning slightly red, then greenish.

"Just talk to her. Ask her about her summer," I replied in a low voice. "And just… do what feels right. With luck, you'll be exactly like him in five minutes." I pointed toward Sirius, who was sprawled out on the bench with the blond girl Alma on top of him. Remus laughed slightly, then his face fell and her turned green once again as he saw her drawing closer.

"And don't look so sick! Smile!" I reminded him. He nodded and tried to smile, but it was basically a grimace. "Oh, never mind. You'll smile once she's over here. Like an idiot. But try not to look like _too_ much of an idiot." She was almost at our table, and Remus still looked like he was about to throw up.

"Hey," Scarlett greeted us, trying her best to sound calm. I could tell that she was nervous, though.

"Heyhowwasyoursummer?" Remus asked, so flustered all his words ran into each other.

It took all of my strength not to grimace, and Remus gave me a frantic and apologetic look as if to say, "I'm so sorry! Now what do I do?"

But to my surprise, Scarlett giggled. "I think you just asked me how my summer was, but I'm not sure.

He nodded sheepishly.

"Well, it's been wonderful. Howwasyoursummer?" she asked, imitating him  
.  
Even he had to laugh at that. "Great."

Remus seemed to have calmed down, so I stood up. "Well, I hate to intrude, so I'm going to go off on my own for a while. I'll meet you back here in an hour and a half, okay Remus?"

I walked past them and patted Remus on the back, "You'll do fine," I whispered in his ear.

"Bye, you guys," I said.

"Bye," Scarlett replied.

"See you later," Remus added.

I walked down the street for a while before I realized something—there was _nothing_ for me to do. I looked back to find Remus and Scarlett, but they were no longer there. Backtracking a bit, I made my way back to the bench next to the one Sirius was occupying through the crowd. It seemed to have gotten busier here since I had left the table, but at least it was entertaining. Many people yelled thing to Sirius such as, "Get a room!" He was, however, oblivious, which didn't surprise me much.

For a second I wondered whether I should tell him that Remus had finally gotten Scarlett, but I decided he'd be way too mad at me for disturbing his snogging session to be happy for Remus. But then I remembered that Scarlett had been with Lily, Cassara and Robyn on a bench very close to Sirius, and looked over to see if they were still there. They were.

I was surprised to find Lily staring back at me. She gave me a slight frown, then turned back to Cassara and Robyn, who were both standing up and laughing hysterically. Robyn said something and Cassara nodded vigorously, then they each grabbed one of her arms and pulled her to her feet, leading her over in my direction.

_It still feels like they're missing someone,_ I thought. Then I remembered that Scarlett and Remus were together. But that still didn't seem like it.

It dawned on me that they were probably coming over to see me. Cassara and Robyn were sort of my friends, what with all of the Quidditch we'd played together, and I knew that they were doing their best to get Lily to give me a chance. It hadn't worked so far, but there was still another year. Well, that is, if you only counted the time we had left in Hogwarts.

Lily was still being half-dragged in my direction when I looked at them again. When they finally arrived here, Lily stood there awkwardly for a second. I saw Cassara look over at Sirius briefly, and a cloud passed over her face. Robyn and I both knew that she liked him, but we had sworn not to tell, so we were the only two. In most cases, I think I probably would've told. But I guess I felt obligated, partially because she was my friend and partially because I knew Lily would only hate me more if I did. She got over it quickly though—she was obviously used to things like this happening. She elbowed Lily and smiled slightly at me. "Hey, Potter," she greeted me in a clipped tone.

"Hey, Evans." I replied. "You're hot."

She glared at me and warned, "Don't start."

Robyn, sensing the tension, asked, "So, James, you're the captain, right?" I didn't have time to say anything else, which might've been lucky. Who knows what Lily would've done to me.

"Yeah," I answered. "Our team's basically the same, which is good because it was really strong last year."

"But you have to replace Dexter and Carl, which might not be easy," Cassara said. Dexter had been one of our Beaters (Robyn was the other), but he had graduated the year before. He'd been a decent player, but I had seen better. Since he was the captain, though, he still got to play on. I have to say, he had the leadership thing down; he was bossy as hell. But that still didn't make him a good player. Carl had been the seeker last year, and he'd been pretty good, but not really anything to write home about.

"He wasn't all that great," I reminded them.

"I know, but you may not be able to find anyone better," said Robyn.

"I still don't understand what you see in Quidditch," Lily complained. "It's just a weird sport where you throw things at each other and attack each other with bats."

"But that's the fun of it!" Robyn exclaimed.

"Well, nothing's fun for you unless you can hit something with a bat or kick something," Lily retorted. As usual, her mood was bad now that she was around us.

I heard footsteps behind us. At first I didn't think much of it, but they kept coming closer and started slowing down as they neared us. "Hey guys," A familiar voice said.

My stomach dropped. It was Eve. _No wonder I felt like I was forgetting someone,_ I thought, turning around slowly  
.  
My stomach fluttered slightly as I saw again how beautiful she was. She was slightly paler and thinner, but that was understandable. I mean, she'd lost her brother and dad! "Hey Eve," I said.

I'd thought a lot about her brother over the summer. He'd been our Quidditch team captain my first and second years playing (in my second and third years), and he'd been really good. Our team had a lot of new players, and he'd never gotten annoyed with any of us for missing a pass or throwing it off. It amazed me that anyone could be so patient and genuinely _nice_ all the time. It also amazed me that someone like that could've died so suddenly. I guess if there was something I should take from it, it was that anything could happen. And that it was always the best people who died.

"Hi, James." She grinned slightly. "How was your summer?"

"It was good," I replied. "How are you?" I decided to ask that instead of how her summer was, because it probably wasn't all that great. Aside from losing her brother and dad, she now had only her mother, a muggle who Cassara and Robyn had said wasn't comfortable with the thought of magic, despite the fact that her husband (or her former husband, I suppose) and her children were all wizards. Unlike Robyn's mother, though, at least it seemed she cared for them and tried her best to understand what was going on.

"I'm okay," she answered, sighing.

"Glad to hear it," I said.

"Did you get the present for Juli?" Lily wanted to know. She was acting strangely, even for when she was around me.

I wonder what's going on? I thought. _I guess she might be jealous about me talking to Eve, but why? She doesn't like me. Or at least she didn't last time I checked._

"Yeah," said Eve. "I got the frog."

"Frog?" I asked.

"Juli's wanted a frog for a while, so I decided I should finally just get it for her, since her birthday's tomorrow," she replied.

"I still don't understand what she sees in frogs," Cassara declared, wrinkling her nose. "They're all warty and gross."

"How are you going to keep it from her until her birthday?" asked Robyn.

Eve's eyebrows furrowed. "I hadn't thought about that," she admitted. "I guess I'll just have to give it to her early. I'm not going to take care of it until her birthday. I don't get why she likes them so much, either."

"So, James, are you the Quidditch team captain?" Eve asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Cool. I'm thinking about trying out," she told me.

"For seeker?" Robyn inquired incredulously.

"Yeah, why?" Eve asked defensively. "I mean, I can't imagine there'd be anyone much better, now that Carl's gone."

"Good for you, Evie," Cassara congratulated her, but I could hear the uncertainty in her voice. They didn't want her getting hurt again after something so tragic had just happened.

We talked for a while longer. Lily seemed to be avoiding talking to me, but at least she hadn't run away yet. I caught her glancing at me and then Eve several times. It seemed weird, but I decided it was best not to comment on it so that Lily didn't strangle me.

It seemed strange to me that Lily hadn't mentioned being Head Girl. I decided not to bring it up, though, because I figured that if she wasn't it, she wouldn't be too happy, and even if she was, she still wouldn't be too happy because _I_ was Head Boy.

After about an hour, Remus and Scarlett came over to the bench. Scarlett's fair skin was flushed and she was grinning widely.

"What happened?" I asked Remus under my breath.

He looked at me innocently and replied, "Nothing." But I could tell he was keeping something from me. Hopefully I'd be able to get it out later.

Scarlett was smiling widely and seemed to be staring off into space. _She's in love_, I thought. I was really happy for her and Remus. They totally deserved each other.

"Scarlett, are you alive?" Lily asked sarcastically.

She smiled dreamily. "Yes," she sighed languorously.

"Nothing my ass," I muttered in Remus's ear. He smiled and shrugged secretively.

Lily glanced at her watch and told Scarlett, "I think we should leave, your mum was expecting us ten minutes ago."

That snapped Scarlett out of her euphoria. She sighed and pouted. "Do we have to?" she whined, sounding like a three-year-old.

_Well, love does crazy things to you,_ I thought.

"You know how worried your um was just letting us come her by ourselves," Lily reminded her.

"Yeah, and with You-Know-Who running loose, your mum'll probably expect the worst. Hell, she probably already does," Robyn added. Calling Volemort You-Know-Who was becoming a trend; people were starting to fear him so much that they refused to say his name. I said it, but just so that the people around me didn't get angry when I called him Voldemort.

"We should probably be getting back, too," Remus said, looking up at the darkening sky. "Your mum wanted us home before dark."

Scarlett giggled coyly. "Good luck getting Sirius away from that girl." Then she pecked him on the cheek and Disapparated.

Lily, Robyn, Eve, Cassara and I gaped at Remus, whose face was bright red.

Lily, as usual, was the first to regain her composure. "Are you going out?" she asked.

He nodded slowly.

Cassara squealed and ran at him, almost knocking him down with her force while she hugged him. "Oh, my God! I'm so happy for you!" she shrieked. "I've got to go congratulate Scarlett!" And with that, she took a few steps back and Disapparated.

Robyn, Eve, and Lily congratulated him in a more civil manner, then Disapparated as well. Remus and I were left alone. It was quiet; almost everyone was gone from the streets.

"Congratulations, Moony," I said. "You must've done well."

He smiled. "I don't know if I ever could've done it without your advice. And to be honest, I'm still in shock."

"I can tell," I replied. "Now we have to retrieve Sirius."

Remus patted me on the back. "Since you're such a good friend, you can do it."  
I rolled my eyes at him but decided it wasn't worth an argument. I rolled up my sleeves and turned around. It was almost surprising to see them still going at it; I mean, they'd been making out for hours.

I walked over cautiously and tentatively tapped him on the shoulder. As I'd expected, he didn't move.

I tried again, poking him and yelling, "Sirius!"

"Go away," he said, his lips never leaving hers. I looked back at Remus, who had a slightly surprised look on his face.

"Sirius, we have to go. It's getting late," I said, hoping the third time was the charm.

He slowed up a little, then pulled himself off of her. "Fine." He turned to the girl. "Alma, I'll see you later."

"It's Allison," she reminded him.

"Right. I'll see you later Allison."

"Bye, Sirius," she replied.

He stood up reluctantly, then the three of us Apparated home. I still hated that sucking feeling, but I decided it was more convenient than riding a broom around or walking for the rest of my life.

Once we were back, we told Sirius all that he had missed, and he said he was almost sad he had missed it, which was a new thing for him. Normally snogging sessions were his life.

"Good job, Remus," Sirius said. "Between you and Scarlett and James and Eve, this should be one of the most interesting years yet."

And he was right.

* * *

**A/N: Well,. I hope you liked it… as you can imagine, it took me a while to write. So review. Please.**


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